From the local police blotter:
Drunk disturbance, Aug. 21 — The captain from a fishing vessel requested assistance with a drunk and unruly crewman. The crewman refused to stay in his stateroom and was making a general nuisance of himself. Although he was annoying, he had not as yet violated any criminal statutes. Prior to officer's arrival, the individual fled the area. Officers were unsuccessful in finding him. The captain advised he would call if he needed further assistance.
Welfare check, Aug. 26 — Caller reported seeing a flare in the area of Hog Island. A check of vessels in the area did not disclose any in need of emergency assistance. It was later discovered that the flare had been set off by individuals on the beach. The individuals were contacted and reminded that emergency flares were for emergencies only.
Alcohol, Sept. 6 — Officers responded to a report of an individual who was practicing his kung fu in the middle of the roadway. Officers found him wallowing in the mud on the side of the roadway. The individual was taken into protective custody and released to a sober adult.
Death investigation, Sept. 12 — Officer initiated a death investigation into the events surrounding the discovery of a body in a creek.
Civil, Sept. 13 — Caller wanted to pursue charges against her boyfriend for getting fired before he could repay the money he owed her. The caller was advised the matter was not criminal in nature.
Assault, Sept. 16 — Dipsomaniacal caller reported being assaulted. The caller provided numerous accounts of an alleged assault. Each account stretched the bounds of believability. None of the accounts were supported by physical, testimonial or empirical evidence.
Outreach, Sept. 17 — Fire officer assisted in creating a mud pit for a local "Mud Run."
Theft, Sept. 18 — A taxi driver requested assistance with a fare who was unable to pay his fare. The officer was able to negotiate a fair fare for the fare which was paid for by the fare's friend.
Fire response, Sept. 19 — Fire officers responded to an explosion at a local fish processing plant.
Suspicious activity, Sept. 21 — Caller reported that his employee found a human jaw bone while beachcombing. The bone appeared to be archaeological in nature. It was packaged and sent to the state crime lab for confirmation.
Suspicious person, Sept. 22 — Complainant wanted to advise police that the individual he had just fired was a "Bad Man."
Suspicious person, Sept. 23 — Officers contacted an individual under the South Channel Bridge. The individual was found to be fishing for Dungeness crab from shore, without success.