Dutch Harbor report

From the local police blotter:

June 24 — Officers responded to a report of a domestic dispute between a man and his wife. The man, fortified by liquid courage, confronted his wife concerning her unfaithfulness. She did not want to discuss this subject so the man left. The wife attempted to persuade her husband to stay by hitting him about the head and shoulders. The two were separated for the night.

June 24 — Dispatch received a 911 call from a besotted individual reporting that his female friend was having a baby. Dispatch had information that the friend was not in fact pregnant. Officers responded and confirmed that no birth was imminent. The original caller stated he believed his heavily intoxicated friend’s water had broken all over his bedroom floor. Officers pointed out that it was more likely his friend urinated on his floor.

June 26 — Officers assisted in removing a drunken individual from a bunkhouse room where he had kicked in the door so that he could party with the occupants. The occupants had specifically locked the individual out of the room because they did not want to party with him. The individual was trespassed from the room.

June 26 — Individual walked into Public Safety and requested assistance with tagging and following the individuals who were following him. The miscreants have been following the individual for several years through several different states and are always saying bad things about him. He is unable to describe the scoundrels as he has never actually seen them. The individual was referred to other services for assistance.

June 26 — Complainant reported a pack of wild 2-month-old kittens creating a nuisance. Officers were unable to locate the ferocious felines.

June 26 — Officers responded to a report of a strong marijuana odor emitting from a hotel room. Officers determined that individuals had indeed been smoking marijuana inside the room but had consumed all of the evidence.

June 26 — UniSea Inc. issued a permanent trespass order against the aforementioned cannabis consumer.

June 28 — Officers assisted in convincing a heavily intoxicated crewmember to return to his bunk and stop threatening his coworkers before they stop forgiving him and start pressing charges. The sot was tucked carefully into his bunk without further incident.

June 29 — Officers responded to investigate a report of an assault between roommates at a local processing plant. The reporting roommate, who was slightly intoxicated, reported he was assaulted the previous night. Officers contacted the two roommates who gave similar accounts of the initial reporting roommate returning to the room in a drunken stupor and falling down several times and challenging both sober roommates to fight. The roommates were finally able to assist dipsomaniac to his bunk. Due to the corroborated stories of the two roommates and the fact that the initial reporting roommate was still intoxicated several hours after the incident, no charges were filed.

June 29 — EMS responded via Harbor Vessel to assist a patient aboard a tramper.

June 30 — Officers investigated a report of an individual stealing rebar from a processing plant. The individual believed the palletized, size-organized and strapped-down rebar to be scrap. The rebar was returned.

June 30 — Complainant reported that an 8-year-old had dumped a can of motor oil in the lake. Officers assisted in notifying the proper authorities to get the oil cleaned up.