Dutch Harbor report

From the local police blotter:

Animal, June 7 — A motorist struck and killed two bald eagles, and injured two others, near the landfill. The investigation was turned over to the Alaska State Troopers, who later advised that the motorist would be charged.

Suspicious person, June 8 — Vessel captain reported that a balding man with a mustache, wearing a long dress and fishnet stockings, had been walking up and down the roadway near his boat since early this morning and was now inside a pickup, on the dock next to his boat, pleasuring himself. The captain was primarily worried that some of his young and female crew might be offended. Officers contacted the suspect, who admitted to some elements of the complaint, and advised him that he might be better off pursuing his activities in a private location.

Animal, June 12 — A patron of the Dutch Harbor Post Office was attacked by a nesting eagle as she wheeled a package cart into the building. The woman was treated at the clinic for several puncture wounds to her scalp and ear.

Public safety, June 12 — Postmistress, who advised that four postal patrons had been attacked in the last week, asked for additional signage warning of the threat posed by a pair of nesting national symbols.

Assault, June 13 — Two adult males who had been bickering like children ever since they began working together on a fishing boat engaged in an altercation involving some choking, punching and threats by one or both parties. No charges were filed per the district attorney and the vessel captain said he intended to have the two men put on different boats.